Gabby Windey and girlfriend Robby Hoffman’s romance keeps getting stronger after five months together — and that includes their sex life.
“I feel safer with a woman. I feel less judged and I feel like there’s nothing off limits. If I have a question, I’m going to ask — before, after, during,” the former Bachelorette, 32, said during the Wednesday, August 30, episode of the “Just B with Bethenny Frankel” podcast. “We will debrief on our sex life. It feels very safe.”
Windey’s romance with Hoffman, 33, is her first relationship with a woman. Frankel, 52, asked what it was like getting used to the “new hardware.”
“Well, not really new because I have one, so I would say it’s familiar hardware,” Windey quipped, noting that she previously felt like she had “unrealistic expectations” in the bedroom when she exclusively dated men.
“I felt like there were unsaid expectations because we weren’t as open about it. We weren’t speaking the same language [and] I didn’t feel as connected,” Windey explained. “I feel like that part [with Robby] has been really freeing for me. … With us, yeah, it’s a little awkward, but it’s worth it because we want to talk about everything and we want to make sure the other person is pleased and happy.”
Windey, who got engaged to Erich Schwer during her tenure on The Bachelorette season 19, further emphasized that sex can and should be “fun,” as well as “freeing and liberating,” when you do it with “someone that you feel safe with.”
“I need an emotional connection and with Robby, I feel very emotionally connected,” she said.
Windey and Schwer, 30, announced their split in October 2022 while she was competing on Dancing With the Stars season 31. Several months later, she began questioning her sexuality.
“I went on tour with Dancing With the Stars, whatever that was, … we were watching Perfect Match on Netflix and they had a queer story line with two girls and it seemed very genuine,” she recalled to Frankel, referring to Francesca Farago and Abbey Humphreys’ partnership. “It was the first time I saw girls who I kind of identified with [dating each other] … so, I’m like, ‘This seems genuine.’”
Windey’s good friend Bridget, who identifies as queer, also played a part in her awakening. The Bachelor alum subsequently started going to a few LGBTQIA+ events in Los Angeles and went on dates with women. She met Hoffman outside of a bar and they quickly connected.
“You just get to be a lot softer and loving,” Windey said of their relationship. “She asked me to be her girlfriend with a Ring Pop, [which was] so cute. [It happened] two weeks in [and] she wrote me a little card. We are always giving each other cards. She got me these earrings [I’m wearing now] for our three-month anniversary. We celebrate every month. If a dude were to do that to me, disgusting.”
