Stassi Schroeder returned to her podcast after welcoming son Messer last month — and she had a lot to say about how her newborn’s arrival differed from his sister’s.
Schroeder, 35, said that she labored for about eight hours at home before she went to the hospital to deliver daughter Hartford, now 2, in January 2021. This time, however, things happened much more quickly. When she started experiencing contractions, they were so painful that she soon realized it was “the real thing.”
Schroeder’s doula came over to guide her through the pain, but the exercises were a bit more than she bargained for. “She had me upside down in a handstand off the side of my bed,” Schroeder recalled during the Wednesday, October 4, episode of “Straight Up With Stassi,” joking that she felt like she was either going to die or throw up.
Hartford, meanwhile, was not at all disturbed by her mother’s distress. “Hartford comes in and she could give a f–k that I was screaming in pain,” Schroeder said. “I realized that my child does not care about me if I’m in pain. She was so unbothered. She came in and she just seemed annoyed that I was in pain, that I was going through something. She went upstairs and watched Cinder-f–kin-rella, you guys.”
More seriously, Schroeder said she felt like she understood why childbirth was so dangerous before the advent of modern medicine — and still is. She and husband Beau Clark compared the situation to HBO’s House of the Dragon, which infamously featured several graphic birth scenes during its first season.
“If you would have transported me back in time, the amount of pain that I felt, I would have been convinced that I’m one of those people that’s gonna die,” Schroeder told Clark, 43. “I would have been telling you, ‘Make sure you do anything to save the baby, tell Hartford that I love her.’ That is the pain that I felt.”
After arriving at the hospital, Schroeder got an epidural and immediately started to feel better, but she still thought it would be a while before Messer arrived. Once she started pushing, though, that was not the case.
“The baby came out in under 50 seconds,” Schroeder revealed, with Clark adding that she only pushed once. “I could have laughed this baby out. … He did the Macarena out of my vagina. It was a party. It was like nothing I’ve ever heard of.”
Schroeder announced her second pregnancy via Instagram in March. “Secrets stress me out,” she wrote at the time. “Baby #2, I love you so much already.”
Days later, she confirmed that the duo were expecting a boy — and she suspected as much before she found out. “I knew the whole entire time that we were having a boy,” she explained during a March episode of her and Clark’s “The Good The Bad The Baby” podcast. “I kept saying it. I felt it. It was a vibe. … I don’t know how to f–king explain it.”
