Allison Holker has been able to depend on Ellen DeGeneres for support following husband Stephen “tWitch” Boss’ death.
“I have so many incredible people around me. Ellen was a huge support system for me and still is,” Holker, 35, said on the Thursday, January 18, episode of the “Viall Files” podcast. “She would always just have such wise words for me, and I would say that outside of me and our dearest friends, she knew him better than anyone else too.”
Us Weekly confirmed in December 2022 that Boss died by suicide at the age of 40.
“[Ellen] knew him [and] she spent a lot of time with him,” Holker added on Thursday. “So, we’ve had these really beautiful conversations about it and him and share in laughter and grief. But, she’d always come through with some really solid, sound advice for me, for my future, getting through everything and for my kids. She’s been so lovely.”
Boss is survived by wife Holker, whom he married in 2013, and their three children. Holker and Boss shared Weslie, 15, Maddox, 7, and Zaia, 3. (Weslie is Holker’s daughter from a previous relationship, whom Boss had adopted.)
“It is with the heaviest of hearts that I have to share my husband Stephen has left us,” Holker said in a statement at the time. “Stephen lit up every room he stepped into. He valued family, friends and community above all else and leading with love and light was everything to him. He was the backbone of our family, the best husband and father, and an inspiration to his fans.”
Boss, who rose to fame on So You Think You Can Dance season 4, was best known as DeGeneres’ talk show DJ from 2014 to 2022. (Boss became an executive producer on the daytime series in 2020.)
Since the first anniversary of Boss’ death, Holker has been candid about navigating the peaks and valleys of her grief.
“My love for Stephen [and] the love that he had for us, and still has, … I still feel his presence,” Holker told podcast host Nick Viall. “I still feel him protecting me, I still feel him [and] my kids talk about that as well. His love that was so great for us is still with us, so for me I try to hold onto that and remember that I’m still gonna have dark days, I’m still gonna have lows … but it’s all about the way you choose to move forward with it.”
Holker further noted that she has continued to speak to Boss “really actively” following his passing.
“I talk to him almost every single night for a really long time,” she said. “I could be about anything from, ‘How was your day today?’ or I would be really upset and yelling at him sometimes. There’s times I just screamed and there’s times I’d be like, ‘I’m picking a school for the kids, what do you think?’ And just wait for an answer.”
Holker noted that the “biggest” and most healing conversation she had with Boss after he died was when she told him, “I forgive him and hope you found that peace he needed.”
If you or someone you know is in emotional distress or considering suicide, call the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988.
