Love Is Blind season 6 star Clay Gravesande worked through fears of being unfaithful throughout his engagement to Amber Desiree “AD” Smith — which stayed with him until the wedding day.
“[It is a result of] my parents’ marriage, and they actually had a divorce,” Clay, 31, exclusively told Us Weekly ahead of the season 6 premiere. “I think that always just plays in the back of your mind as you navigate through relationships.”
Clay got engaged to AD, 33, in the Netflix pods when the dating experiment came to Charlotte, North Carolina. While Clay was all-in on AD, he wasn’t sure if he’d get down on one knee or say “I do” at the altar because of his fears of monogamy.
“I’m always having a fear of, ‘Can I just be with one person?’” he said in an episode confessional.
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Clay has since credited AD with helping him work through his issues. “Yeah, AD is awesome. She’s awesome,” he told Us.
After Clay and AD met in person and jetted off on their Dominican Republic getaway, they wasted no time getting vulnerable. Clay even stressed in episode 5 that he wanted to go through couples counseling with AD.
“Marriage doesn’t have to be traditional. I don’t even know the rules of marriage, honestly, your father not being there [to walk you down the aisle] is not something that should hold you back,” he told AD in an episode that began streaming earlier this month. “You told me how your father was — and rest in peace — but he wasn’t there for you; your brothers were. They should be the ones … let them walk you down the aisle and walk you into love.”
He continued: “Marriage is between two people [and] I chose you and that’s why I’m here for you to show me the way and just always love me for who I actually am. To me, that was the most validating thing I think could have ever have, honestly.”
Earlier in that episode, Clay admitted in a confessional that he wanted to “be vulnerable” with AD and not solely “sexualizing her.”
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“I need to make sure that she’s looked at as the queen that she is,” he said. “At the end of the day, this is my fiancée and there has to be respect on that level.”
AD also felt a strong physical connection with Clay but did notice a few alarm bells ringing.
“Oh my gosh, Clay is a walking red flag,” AD quipped to Us earlier this month. “I mean, from the moment I met him, it was [like], ‘red flag, red flag.’ When he wanted to know about the physical and what I looked like, I think that was very telling and a huge red flag.”
In the pods, Clay had been candid about his tendency to prioritize a physical connection over an emotional one. When they left the pods, he tried to work hard on his communication to nurture both types of bonds equally.
Love Is Blind season 6 is currently streaming on Netflix. New episodes drop weekly.
With reporting by Christina Garibaldi